There are a lot of things I've encountered lately that have been contributing to my thoughts on accepting yourself and embracing your own beauty (besides Amy's series). Most recently I saw a comment on a youtube trailer for the new movie "Brave" that said, "Finally, A Disney princess without perfect hair." Perfect. That word has been on my mind frequently these days. I hear a lot of talk about perfect. The perfect skin, the perfect body, the perfect hair. I hear a lot of girls say, "I'm not perfect, but, you know, I'm happy with my body." I'm kind of done with that kind of thinking. The Disney princess in Brave DOES have perfect hair. It's wild and free and vibrant and gorgeous! How is that not perfect?
I have cellulite on my thighs, my skin isn't taut and tan, and I have ruddy cheeks. How is that not perfect? Who is to say what perfection is? Who is this mystery person, this mystery committee, who has determined that a certain body, skin, and hair is "perfect" and the best the rest of us can do is say, "well, I know I'm not perfect, but I'm happy with my body." I understand that this culturally influenced concept of perfect is constantly changing with the times. Culturally, "perfect" looked much different to people in the 16th century, and "perfect" looks much different in other cultures around the globe. I want to stop thinking about perfect being something that is dictated by culture, though. I want to take back the word perfect and own it.
Somewhere along the lines, in this culture, "perfect" has come to mean manicured and "flawless." Every. Single. Photograph in fashion magazines is photoshopped within an inch of it's life. Human bodies are stripped of their pores, their freckles, their bulges and wrinkles. And we've come to accept that this is perfection. That removing every sign of life, every wrinkle we've acquired from laughing with friends late into the night, every slightly yellowed tooth from too many cups of coffee while reading our favorite book, every freckle from days spent in the sun, every bulge from enjoying delicious food... is what perfection looks like.
I want to look everyone in the eye and tell them that they. are. perfect. Cellulite is perfect. Thunder thighs are perfect. Crazy curly hair is perfect. Small breasts are perfect. To me, those are things that society's version of perfect would tell me are flaws for my body, but replace those with things you see as flaws on your body! What are the things that you look in the mirror and sneer at? Reject the voices that tell you that those are imperfections. Replace those voices with ones that tell you how beautiful those "flaws" are.
I am healthy and active (most of the time). I am happy. I am loved. Is that not perfection? No, I'm supposed to hate my body, the one I get to spend my whole life experiencing the world through, instead. I refuse that. I'm not going to hate my body because I have big thighs and cellulite, or a belly pooch that won't go away no matter how many crunches I do, or because my arms are thicker and shorter than the arms models have, or because my hair is huge and unruly. And you shouldn't hate your body because it's skinny, or lumpy, or concave, or convex, or because you have big boobs, or because you barely have any boobs, or because your skin has a condition, or because you're hairy, or because you have thin hair, or because you have dark skin, or because you aren't tan, etc. etc. You are perfect and valuable because you are a human life. And what a shame it would be to spend your entire life hating the one body you have. The body through which all experiences are filtered in this world.
I love this little clip of Eve Ensler. I think she communicates much more succinctly what I've been babbling on about for many paragraphs...
Once we get rid of this notion that perfection is a mold that each of us, with our infinite differences, must try to squeeze into, it's easy to see that perfection is totally and completely individual. I am perfect. You are perfect. If you're a magazine model, you are perfect. If you're a size 16, you are perfect. If you've had a limb amputated, you're perfect. If you have Down's Syndrome, you are perfect. If you're Cinderella, you're perfect. If you're Merida, you're perfect. We are all composed of "imperfections" and instead of counting our flaws in the mirror, we should take back ownership of the word "perfection". Own it. You own perfection. Perfection doesn't own you. You may think it's easier for women who do fit the current beauty ideal to love their bodies, but I guarantee that every woman has felt the sting of the word "perfect," and we can't go around saying, "well, it must be easy for you to love your body."
I realize that the issue of body size and body acceptance is a complex one. There are many discussions about health and weight going on which are related to body acceptance. I'm all for health and changing your body in the interest of becoming more healthy. I know Tieka has shared her experience with losing a lot of weight after starting to live a healthier lifestyle, which is great. If someone wants to change their body because they hate it, I suppose that's your prerogative, but I wish people would want to become healthier because they love their body instead. And if healthy ends up looking different than the image you had in your mind, that should be okay.
Today I'm taking Amy literally and embracing my inner pin-up. Well, with these photos, I guess I'm letting my inner pin-up out for the day. It's a bit awkward and extremely vulnerable to post bikini photos on the internet, but here I am. You might think I'm too skinny, too fat, or "perfect" but I don't care what you think, because frankly what you think doesn't matter (and if you feel like leaving a comment letting me know that you think I'm too fat or skinny, I'm much obliged to delete that shit). I'm loving the body I have and I'm owning perfect.
As a disclaimer, I realize that the discussion about body image, society, and beauty is a hot button issue. Everyone seems to feel pretty strongly about this topic (quite literally, we women have a lot of skin in the game, and things get personal pretty fast) and sometimes the discussion can devolve into bashing one another with hurtful words. If you'd like to contribute to this discussion in the comments, feel free to do so! I'd love to hear your thoughts on this topic, but please remember to be respectful.
*My intensedebate commenting seems to have gone down, so blogger comments have taken over. If you've written a comment before w/ the intensedebate commenting, don't worry! It's still there and I can read them, they just won't show up on my blog.*
104 comments:
I have the same swim suit! awesome post! I think a lot of women will appreciate reading this. You make a beautiful pin-up!
www.geenarose.blogspot.com
I love your swim suit. I thought your post was fabulous. Still being in highschool I see a lot of girls who don't see how beautiful they are, this was a great reminder to everyone that we are ALL perfect!
You are an amazing writer! You have put into words the things I have thought so many times. It feels impossible to think of our bodies as perfect. Its almost like society wants us to feel guilty if we love our bodies. Like we should always be trying to get a little closer to "perfect" and never just accept and enjoy ourselves. I love this idea that you can declare yourself "perfect" without feeling like you are calling others less than perfect.
Great timing for summer which is the hardest time of year to feel perfect.
Also great choice in using pinup photos for your bikini pictures. In my opinion, modern day pinup represents women that come in all different shapes and sizes and colors and are all perfect!
You are PERFECT! Thank you so so so much for posting this dear girl. I am sharing this with my reader and my friends because this is everything I think and feel. You are wonderful for putting yourself out there and it truly goes to show that you believe every word that you have written.
I love everything you say... I think you're amazing and smart and that swimsuit looks great!!
I understand everything you say... and I wish I could feel the same about my body. If you look at me, I'm not fat, I'm not skinny. I'm "normal", whatever that's supposed to be. But it's never good enough for me. I really wish I could accept my body like that!!
I hope many readers are inspired by your words and I hope one day I can finally feel like that too!!
Much love from Paris,
Valentina
http://valentinaduracinsky.blogspot.com/
This post means more to me then you can know.
It couldn't have come at just the right time.
As I sit here holding back the tears of being so utterly ruthless to myself and constantly hating on myself for everything I think is wrong with me you write this. I really hope you know how much of an impact your leaving in someone's life as silly as it may sound.
I know I'm rambling here but I'm just blown away how affected I am by this. I'm so incredibly tired of feeling that I am not right looking cause I have created this hatred towards myself. Always thinking I need to be better and wasting so many years just not living and loving myself for everything I have accomplished. I'm done thinking I'm not good enough or my body is not perfect.
I want to feel fabulous and love and celebrate myself.
I really can't begin to thank you enough.
Larissa
BRILLIANT post!xxx
Thank you so much for such a wonderful post. I think everybody stuggles with loving their body, and I'm so glad you contributed to the conversation. I've had my times of hating my chunky legs and my narrow upper body, I work hard to stay healthy and active, but over the last several months have gained about 10 pounds. I always thought "to loose this weight I have to tell myself I really hate my body and it's current weight and that will give me motivation to loose it", I know that wasn't right but I just didn't feel like I should let myself love my body. So it really spoke to me when you wrote about staying healthy because you love your body. I should want to take care of this body I've been given, because I love it, not because I hate it. Thank you so much.
xo,
Em
Lately, I've been seeing these images on Facebook with full-figured women like Marilyn Monroe that seem to put across a similar message as your post. I am super skinny and have major issues trying to put on weight (so do my sisters & my mom, so I suppose it's hereditary). I never had body image issues before, honestly, because it was always OK to be skinny. The "curves are better" campaign has been making me super self conscience.
BUT - your post has given me a more even-toned way of thinking. There really is no such thing as 'perfect'. Everyone has different tastes. And I'm lucky enough to have a [very skinny] boyfriend who thinks I'm beautiful.. so really, I need to grow up. haha. That should be enough!
Thanks for this!
xo
This is a perfect post :) thank you for writing down feelings I've had on this subject all along, I find it difficult to write my thoughts so when I read this I couldn't help but tear up a bit because it's exactly what I needed to hear :)
The video you posted was also so sweet, thank you for all you do <3 You look absolutely stunning by the way!
I am struggling lately with the same body acceptance issues. I am always frustrated because my boobs are too big in my opinion, my belly isn't perfectly flat, I don't have a pretty tan and my hair is all crazy. Awh, and I think my arms are too big. I guess anything I like about my body is below knee or elbow. But yesterday I decided to buy the very short shorts, and fuck the cellulite issues and pale legs. Everyone has it! I guess even if we were a great top models there still would be things we didn't like about our bodies.
You have sexy thighs, pretty shaped long legs and cute boobs! Hugs to you!
This is one of the best posts I've seen in a LONG time!
Your outlook is absolutely spot on and I wish we could all embrace it as our own. I'm afraid I'm very guilty of being uber ashamed of my body, which is silly because it's not like I'm large at all...I'm probably about the same size as you are. I've worn a bikini a few times but have always felt panicky about anyone seeing the cellulite on the back of my thighs. So silly..
I think I might try to get a suit like this though! Especially as I have a large scar on my stomach and this would cover it up..not that it bothers me but occasionally attracts weird looks!
Thanks so much for writing this Elizabeth! :o)
Thank you, Elizabeth, for that very well-written and meaningful post. So many women need to hear what you said.
And your photos are lovely! You truly are brave, talented and very beautiful.
Such a nice post and you look perfect xxx
i actually wrote a response post to blog posts like this one. i am all for overcoming stereotypes and embracing our bodies for what they are instead of hating ourselves, but i fear that sometimes we neglect the things that could really bring us to self satisfaction. i think we need to do more outside of self reflection. here's the post: http://someoneswaterlily.blogspot.com/2012/06/summer-of-self-betterment.html.
it's not meant to hate on anyone, but to say, "this is not enough. to love myself i have to do things that are meaningful and loveable" - Leah
You look gorgeous in that retro bikini! You shouldn't be hard on yourself. :)
There's this great Margaret Cho quote where she talks about how the advertising industry's have spent billions of dollars on making us feel imperfect.mcause feeling imperfect means you've got to buy stuff to make you feel better. Your pinup pictures are gorgeous! Im inspired to do my own photo shoot too :) Thanks for the great post!
I love this post. You would be such an asset to an organization like a nonprofit we have here in Maine - Hardy Girls, Healthy Women.
Here is some info about the organization:
http://www.hghw.org/content/about-us
Do you have any similar organizations in Washington?
It is so important for women to buck the media's standards of "perfect" and just kick ass at being who they are, naturally!
thank you. you are perfect.
this post was so timely for me. this morning i tried on my bathing suit that i will be wearing for the first time this season tomorrow (and it's nearly identical to yours!). i didn't like what i saw, i criticized myself in the mirror, i swore i wouldn't enjoy another well-earned delicious beer for the rest of the summer, and have been stressed out about it all day.
you've made me realize that i'm perfect too. i'll be thinking of you tomorrow when i step out in my bathing suit and crack open that beer with my friends.
thank you.
AMZAAAAZING POST. All I can say is: YOU GO, GIRL!
This is an amazing post and is such an inspiration to so many girls out there! Thank you for being awesome, brave and confident enough to post this!
I love this.
While in Africa, I had many similar discussions. When I would talk to the woman, they said that they were grateful to be alive, to have a body in the first place. Isn't that all that matters? That we actually have a body that works?
THank you for this. You go, girl!
xoxo,
Sierra
Oh, Just Living the Dream
I literally had tears reading this! Your "rambling" is often just what many will need to hear, so never apologize for it!
P.S. You look PERFECT in your pictures! :)
You look awesome in these photos Elizabeth! I always admire your attitude and strength when it comes to the 'rules' society seems to put up in front women. We need to be this or do that and it always makes me angry. Thanks for always being an inspirational women :)
xx
Kat
You look awesome in these photos Elizabeth! I always admire your attitude and strength when it comes to the 'rules' society seems to put up in front women. We need to be this or do that and it always makes me angry. Thanks for always being an inspirational women :)
xx
Kat
This is a fantastic post, and much needed. I've recently written about people being mean to each other, but we should be less mean to ourselves as well.
Plus, you look great in that swimsuit, go you!
Betty
x
You are damn awesome.
That is all.
xxo
Mary
Fantastic! I have the habit of elevating bloggers to celebrity-like status in my mind, and therefore thinking that they are perfect in the same way impossibly touched up perfect celebrities are. Only it makes me feel some how WORSE because I'm looking at women who are real women, I know they're real because they post their real thoughts, but I still compare myself with them as I would a celebrity and see myself as inadequate. I hope that you putting yourself out there like this inspires other bloggers to do the same.
For a long time I thought I couldn't rock the same fashions, hair or even be confident in myself like you are, but this post made me realize that we're not so different. You're a real women just like your readers and I feel like this post has totally created a new trust in and respect for you that I don't necessarily have for other bloggers that may try to elevate themselves to the "celebrity" status. So thanks for being real with us. <3
Thank you for having the confidence that many of us don't have yet.
Come check out a new twist on Bruschetta.
http://www.becauseofmadalene.com/2012/06/sun-dried-tomato-and-pesto-bruschetta.html
Christina
Thank you for your post! I'm skinny and always have been, and used to feel really insecure about it because people would always comment on it, even though they were in a way complimenting me. Now that I'm in college, I've learned to shrug it off, and I'm much better at just owning it. Your post is right -- fat, skinny, big or small boobed, everyone always thinks the grass is greener somewhere else. I love reading things like your post because they encourage me to embrace who I am, and help build my confidence.
And on another note, you look great in your bikini. Props to you for feeling confident enough to pose it in!
elizabeth... i have tears in my eyes. your passion and fieriness and courage amaze me. i don't have an extreme body story, either - but i don't believe for a moment that there is a woman anywhere who hasn't experienced the feeling that they are not *good enough. i commend you again and again and again for standing up and speaking what is undeniably a PERFECT truth, and i can't thank you for that enough.
although this whole essay is eloquently and passionately written, two phrases especially jumped out at me. the first - "removing every sign of life" - is the single most accurate description of advertisements i have ever come across. i am absolutely stunned and shocked as i realize this is sadly exactly what has happened to our image of beauty.
secondly, thank you so. much. for recognizing that women of all sizes should love their bodies. i was especially touched when you said this not only about said that women with small boobs, but with big boobs, too - something that seems so valued. i wear a 34DD but am otherwise petite. i am really tired about hearing how "happy" i should be with my body just because i have big boobs. i have long wished to be small chested, and feel so uncomfortable knowing all of the stereotypes and feeling the unwanted stares of people who think i'm either an object or slutty. but you know what? my hands are beautiful, too. my barely-there hips. my thighs that kiss. my laugh lines. thank you for acknowledging that all sizes (even my own) are beautiful.
and damn, girlie, the phrase "i'm much obliged to delete that shit" made me get goosebumps. you shine from the inside out. ROCK ON!
I love these photographs!! You look pin-up-tastic!! Hahah.
Elizabeth! You are such an inspiration. Seriously you are!! I admire you a ton!
Thanks for another amazing post!!
-Britney of Lemonwood and Honey
You didn't babble at all. I love this entire post; your thoughts are exactly what I needed to hear, so thank you for sharing.
P.S. you're simply gorgeous!
Elizabeth, you are my hero! I love what you have written here. Your positive attitude and sincerity brings a freshness to the long-discussed issue of women's body issues. I completely agree with what you say here, but I also think that it takes bravery to say it - so thank you! I think that beauty is being comfortable and healthy in your own skin - if you don't have that, then nothing will be "perfect." Do what feels right for yourself and your body, but at the same time recognize that you must take care of yourself! I say this as a bride to be, who has struggled with weight issues for the past few years; like you I'm average. I'm not particularly fat, but I'm not as skinny as I think I SHOULD be. And that attitude has been responsible for so much stress in my life. As I plan my wedding, and talk about my future with the man that I love (and who loves every inch of me), I've come to realize that I am my own worst enemy. As you say, this is a complicated and convoluted conversation. Self confidence and health are beautiful things, but unfortunately far undervalued.
FANTASTIC POST! JUST FANTASTIC!
You are absolutely inspirational, and I couldn't agree more. A few years ago I suffered from anorexia and self-harm along with the depression that I'm beating right now, and I've since made it my mission to do exactly what you've done in this post: inspire people to love themselves, exactly as they are. Humans are truly beautiful creatures, no matter what shape or size or colour. I revere your courage, and you are truly an inspiration. :)
- Nadine
http://from-themindofadreamer.blogspot.com
You. Are. Amazing.
You are gorgeous, smart, and kind. And that is why I come back to your blog (that and your amazing wardrobe!).
Keep it up!
xo Jennifer
http://seekingstyleblog.wordpress.com
The first thing that came to mind was: Bettie Page! Great smile and confidence!
I thought the same when I saw Brave. A princess that's a person. I posted about it, too. I have crazy hair that people tell me to straighten, I don't have a supermodel figure...wtf cares? What's important is that I'm happy and healthy and that I feel beautiful. I really enjoyed your post today and your courage. =)
-Jess
I've been reading about Amy's self love all over the blogosphere lately and while I think it's a super awesome idea, I haven't had much to say about it because, like you, I'm a normal sized person and I've never struggled with my body image. The one idea I would like to contribute is that, parenting is crucial. My mother has never said anything bad to me about how I look, and more importantly, she's never said anything bad about herself, or anyone else. I think it was incredibly beneficial to me to grow up in a positive environment where not a lot of stock was put into how you look. Don't get me wrong, my mom told me I was beautiful, but she put more emphasis on how I did in school and what kind of friend and person I turned into. What we do and say as adults has such an impact on our children, nieces, and nephews so it's important to remember that, especially when it comes to body issues. Let's not put our burdens on the next generation.
I love this! My body image changes constantly but I always try to love myself no matter what.
I've always had body acceptance issues, and it seems like in the past five or so years it has gotten worse. I got diagnosed with hypothyroidism after gaining over 10 pounds, right after I had just gone through all this trouble to lose 20. And I just lost hope. I let myself go. I stopped trying. And in the process, I also let friendships go and I let my social life go. I still go out, and personal style has been somewhat of a savior for me, but overall, I just don't feel like myself. What hit me the hardest about your post was this:
"No, I'm supposed to hate my body, the one I get to spend my whole life experiencing the world through, instead."
Sometimes we worry so much about how we look that we forget to experience everything else. And even more, I forget to be thankful that this body, this overweight body, with fat arms and cellulite, is the one that allows me to experience all of those things I am only experiencing half-way because I am worried about what someone thinks about my thighs.
Should I make my body better? Absolutely. But I should do it because I love it and because I'm thankful for it, not because I hate it.
There's a line in (500) days of summer where they ask this guy to describe his dream girl. And he does in fact describe her, but then he says, "Robin is better than the girl of my dreams. She's real." And I think that's perfect, the fact that we are real and we experience real things every day and have real thoughts, and real feelings, and real relationships, and as flawed as that might be, that is much much better than any definition of perfect that any culture, media outlet, or magazine could come up with. It's real. This body is real.
And for the record, those photos are awesome and I can't wait for the day when I love my body enough to post it on the internet and embrace my inner pin-up.
THANK YOU. I'm a 17-year-old girl and I've battled for a long time with the idea that there is something "wrong" with my body. Or rather, things. I'm pear shaped, I'm barely an a cup, I have big hips and thighs, a belly that doesn't leave, I have smile lines, I'm hairy all over, I have poofy hair, etc. All my life the media and other people told me these were things that were WRONG with my body. Needless to say, that caused a lot of confusion and it took a very long time time for me to accept these things as normal, let alone "right," "beautiful," or dare I say "perfect."
Why should feel I have to be as hairless as a child? Why should I feel the need to erase natural marks of womanhood? Why should my chest be considered wrong and unwomanly when it has reached it natural size? Why was I told that my body was "wrong"?? I feel so cheated and lied to. Which is why I am so glad you wrote this post!
I think it is the best post I have ever read on body image and I know you can reach so many people with it!
I also love that you said "If someone wants to change their body because they hate it, I suppose that's your prerogative, but I wish people would want to become healthier because they love their body instead." I think that is really the heart of the issue. When you love your body, you take care of it. If you spend all your time hating your body you can't expect to change it for the better.
You are beautiful, even more so because you're helping others find their beauty!!
way to go! thank you for this, it was something i needed to hear.
This is truly an amazing post. :) I've always been conflicted about my body. The media makes it rather difficult for people to feel that they can accept their body, especially I'd it's different than the bodies that are shown publicily. So, thank you for reminding me that WE own perfect, and that we should learn to love ourselves because we were given the body we were given, and we should love and respect it no matter what. amazing post!!
Bottledcreativity.blogspot.com
I think the way you described "perfection" and "beauty" are dead on Miss! I want to thank you for posting a truly real, needed to be said post. I believe (like you said) everyone is beautiful. It is how that person views it. I think after a lot of people read this, you are going to get an honor for girls self esteem (mine included).
I so needed to see this post today. thank you thank you thank you. Much needed perspective xxx
This is an amazing post! Your opinion on the topic is a good one and I love how motivating you wrote it all down. Such an inspiration for all your readers! I can totally relate to feeling strange about posting bikini photos, but kudos to you for doing so! They look fantastic!
I'm a curvy type of girl with a lot of imperfections, but still I like how I look, there's nothing wrong about love-handles, port-wine stains on the foot and leg, pasty skin and chubby cheeks!
I'm not quite there completely loving myself, but let's say I really like myself though and that's already a good thing :)
It's a long process, but I hope society is on its way to a more tolerant opinion on beauty.
Oh by the way, I took part in a very nice campaign of the brand Vedette Shapewear. It's called "Love Your Body" and they asked several bloggers to contribute a motivating quote and photo, you can see it here if you're interested:
http://blog.vedettestore.com/tag/love-your-body
Very motivating contributions, I love them all! :)
thank you, this is awesome.
Thank you! <3
My gosh you are amazing. I absolutely LOVE this!! You look great and damn girl, what an attitude you have about your body...a positive attitude I should say. Embrace that inner pin up girl, as you should!!
AMEN SISTA!!
Thank you for this post! Perfectly worded. Also, that ModCloth swimsuit is fabulous! I love the modest vintage look!
Thank you for this post! Perfectly worded. Also, that ModCloth swimsuit is fabulous! I love the modest vintage look!
Go girl! That swimsuit is HOT and props to you for posting photos.
I've actually struggled with an eating disorder for years. I actually have a really "normal" thin body, but the thing is, every time people tell me I'm skinny it only reinforces the notion that I need to STAY skinny, and thus reinforces the eating disorder. When I'm not around people constantly talking about food or weight, my eating habits are normal and I love my body, but it ALWAYS seems to be the topic of conversation with girls. Why is this the most interesting thing we can find to talk about, and why the hell do people think they should comment on other people's bodies (even if it's a "compliment")??
Anyway...thanks for the post! Very motivating :)
Love your post! I have had issues with not eating enough for years thinking I was Plain Jane and not good enough, freckles, pale skin, early grey hairs showing at the age of 21, broken sticky out collar bone and was highly introspective as a result. Now I'm 45, eat organic, drink too much wine, ha! but lots of water, do a lot of vain things such as still color hair, take care of my nails, take supplements, and have stopped listening to male comments about my physique. I'm 38C at 5 foot and have had every comment made about too big boobs, oh so jealous you have them, etc. Who is choosing these ideals? Honestly, it irritates me that actresses allow themselves to be PShopped when they really don't look like that in real life. Scars tell stories, lumps and bumps come and go and we all really know deep down that there is no such thing as the 'golden life'.
Unfortunately in this day in age it is almost impossible to not feel some of those pressures no matter how strong of a person you are. I whole heartedly agree that perfect is not even really a thing and that everyone has those things that makes them who they are. Even if we were all exactly the same and looked "perfect" I'm sure the definition of that would change, that is just human nature. I feel like that can translate all throughout life, beyond being comfortable with your body. People are constantly striving for these things that they might not even know what they are sometimes, you need to learn to live in the now be happy with yourself and enjoy because no on else can do that for you and who wants to waste their life just wishing instead of living.
-Jessica
http://runninginsideus.blogspot.com/
Hi! How much can I say that I loved this post? I just adore it. Today it was my first time I wore shorts (short) to go in public place and it felt good. Why the hell should I be hiding my body when I'm not fat (but, yes overweighted) and when it is so hot. I just feel free now. Maybe next is going to buy a swimsuit and go to the beach!
I hope one day I can feel that way about myself. I constantly struggle with trying to look my best and I really do wish I could not care. From reading your blog I've started to slowly feel better about all the insignificant things that used to bring me down (one being that I used to hate my naturally curly hair so much) and I want to be able to be comfortable looking in a mirror or seeing myself in pictures without thinking of every flaw I see. I just want to say thank you. I needed inspiration.
great post! sometimes everyone needs this reminder.
you look fabulous in that swimsuit! :)
Thank you for posting this! I've never had any weight issues whether over or under and I'm pretty healthy when it comes to eating, but I still find myself saying I need to fix this or I need to fix that because it's not 'perfect'. From now on, I'll only make changes for my health and because I LOVE myself and my body not the other way around. Oh and if you don't mind, I would love to do a similar blog on my website with a link to yours! You've given me a lot of inspiration. Thank you! :-) by the way, love your bathing suit! You're rockin' it!
simply, thank you.
the blog world, while incessantly positive in some respects, has been detrimental in that many of the photographs, the wardrobes, the make-up savvy has me loathing myself as much as the fashion magazines. i recite truth to myself and the lies fade.
thank you so much. and yes, you are gorgeous & whole & powerful.
Beautiful post. It literally brought tears to my eyes. I've been a bigger girl ever since college and the comments from strangers, family, etc have definitely gotten to me over the years. I never understood why anyone would think it's ok to comment on someone's size. I do my best to love myself at whatever size I may be, I read all the empowering books I can, and even practice daily affirmations....yet even with all that I still hear that little voice telling me I'm not good enough. It's hard work to shut her up, but I work at it every day! I don't want to spend my time on this Earth hating who I am. I try to think of my body in terms of what it has done/is doing for me. I have strong legs that carry me as far as I need to go...a heart big enough to embrace everyone I love...and so on...
Thanks for being such an inspiration! You are beautiful, inside and out!
You look amazing! Just throwing that out there! xo
Elizabeth, this was such an inspiring post. YOU are inspiring. My body was on my mind all day today and how much I can't stand it. This was such a beautiful wake up call. I 100% agree with everything you said, we let society depict what is good and beautiful in this world, which is the #1 problem of today. Society doesn't make us who we are. WE do. And we are all perfect.
<3 Lauren
Elizabeth, this was such an inspiring post. YOU are inspiring. My body was on my mind all day today and how much I can't stand it. This was such a beautiful wake up call. I 100% agree with everything you said, we let society depict what is good and beautiful in this world, which is the #1 problem of today. Society doesn't make us who we are. WE do. And we are all perfect.
<3 Lauren
Perfect. Thank you :)
Life Etc
In the spirit of being honest, I see no cellulite. Just figured you should know.
You look beautiful and real and PERFECT!!!
I just told my husband yesterday (while looking in the mirror) "You know - it has taken me 52 years to be able to say this, but I think I look prettier now than I ever have in my life." Now - with my wrinkles, and my fat and my many, many imperfections- I like the way the woman in the mirror looks. She looks strong and happy and loved and beautiful.
Thank you, just thank you.
You look amazing!!!
I just wanted to thank you for this post. I'm plus sized and I currently intern in fashion. Every day I tell myself that I'm not stylish enough, I'm too lumpy, I'm imperfect. This post really helps me see the good in myself and everyone around me! Thank you <3
of course you are perfect! I love your bikini; I own one similar but a one piece :)
PERFECTION is a beautiful fairy tale that will always leave you wanting more.
Thank you for this post - I have what I consider to be a fairly average body, very similar to yours, and I have finally, after many years of struggling, learned to accept that I am PERFECT.
I think a huge part of the problem is women judging other women - thinking that all skinny women have eating disorders and all larger women are compulsive overeaters, and pinning them within stereotypes, is more damaging than anything the rest of the world can ever do. It's important to remember that we are all WOMEN first and foremost, and being different is just part of being human. I appreciate the underlying goal of the "Real women have curves" campaign, but not all women do. "Skinny" women can struggle with body acceptance as much as everyone else, and I think it's important to keep the prejudice from swinging the other way.
On that note, men can sometimes struggle with it as much as women. We as a society place far too important a role on physical appearance. I think as long as someone looks healthy and IS healthy, clean and well groomed they are perfect.
Perfection is just a matter of perception, anyway.
www.frayed-threads.com
What a wonderful post, I believe society needs to challenge the all-powerful, all-excluding meaning of 'perfect', and we as women are the one's who need to bring about this change, by rejecting pre-conceived notions of perfection.
I am now a follower of your lovely blog, you can follow me at thecottagediaries.blogspot.co.nz
"I've got a perfect body, but sometimes I forget. I've got a perfect body 'cause my eyelashes catch my sweat. Yes they do, they do." -Regina Spektor (Folding Chair)
How divine are you? The perfect pin up figure. Stunning, stunning. Thsui post has made my day, you are gorgeous.
You look gorgeous! It's so great to see someone with so much influence as a blogger, also be so positive about their body. I think you look amazing as a pin up girl!
First of all,I really enjoyed reading this article! Second,you look great! :)
I love this post and the fact that you are establishing the fact that perfect should be something for everyone! The movie Miss Representation talks about this as well and the fact that the media and others affect women's opinions about themselves. At the same time we have the power to fight back and embrace our own awesome! No matter the shape, size, religion, sexuality we are all people and we are all gorgeous! Instead of beating each other up about these so called flaws we should as you said boost each other up! Love the swimsuit look, Love your awesome and reflective blog, and love your curly haired quirky bohemian style!
-young blogger at fanciful impression
You have such a way with words, its amazing! I agree with you, being imperfect, it perfect. We all are who we are and we should not feel the need to change it due to what people think they should look like. Being an individual is being yourself. Thanks for the inspiring words.
xo
Savannah
You look so much like Zooey Deschanel. Gorgeous!
This post rules. I love it. I've only recently (recent as in the past year) begun to accept my body. As a kid, my brother would tease me constantly because I was chunky and enjoyed my Little Debbie snacks. In high school, this guy I had a massive crush on didn't reciprocate those feelings until I joined cross country and lost some weight. I thought that was bullshit and told him that he had his chance. Too late, sucka. I recently saw that person and know that due to my body acceptance and newfound confidence, I am even better than I was back than. I don't need any sort of approval and eat whatever I want. It's called the "see food" diet-- I see food and I eat it. :)
You have no idea how much I needed to read this right now. All summer break I've been stressed about my body that I've been eating mostly only raw foods and exercising like a crazy person only to feel unhappier. Reading this made me realize why am i doing this? What is the sense of it when I'm already healthy? I don't want to waste my summer away! Thank you!
<3Chelsea Elizabeth
PS: you look incredible! what a lovely bathing suit!
<3Chelsea Elizabeth
I had happy tears in my eyes the entire time I was reading your post. Your best comment, to me, was (loosely) "I love my body, so I want it to be healthy." I think that may have changed my life. And I hope that everyone reads that - loving something and taking care of it is soooooo much easier than hating something and constantly wanting to change/fix/destroy it. Just - thank you.
A wonderful, wonderful post!! Thank you so much for sharing this. I LOVED the Vagina Monologues video too - how fantastic!! I wish all women could feel this way 100% of the time. We are ALL BEAUTIFUL and thank you for reminding us of that!
<3
Oddly, the princess in Brave has hair that I would define as perfect, and is the only Disney Princess I would say that about!
I try and drum into myself that being perfect is not fitting a mould, but it's hard on the down days not to feel rubbish because I don't look how other girls look. Although, I'm starting to realise that being a different size and shape isn't necessarily a bad thing. But it is entirely personal, if another person is a different size or shape, I still think them beautiful, it's just me I don't see it in.
Paradoxically, I've always thought you need a little imperfection to make something perfect. Nothing is quite right unless there's a blemish or something that makes a person human. I think we should display our metaphorical battle scars with pride, essentially our body is just a shell protecting what's inside - which is what is most important. It's a shame that society is so shallow that it believe that it is the outside of a person that is most important, when the opposite is true x
Great post! I appreciate seeing such a positive body image message on a blog. I'm doing a reseach project in my grad school program about girls and body image. It's so sad the statistics of young girls that want to change some part of their body at such a young age! Thanks for putting yourself out there and promoting such a healthy and wonderful message on loving your body. We need more role models like you and we need to become our own role models as well. Thanks for posting such a positive message!
Bailey
I love every word of this post! Seriously. Like you, I have never had any huge problem with my body, no eating disorders or so on. However, as I have now reached twenty, my body has changed - no longer the skinny, curveless rail I once was in high school. It took me awhile to accept this change, but I finally have. Though I like to stay in shape, I realize that I am still beautiful with new found curves. Not to mention, as I once was made fun of for having a flat butt, I now have one that makes some women jealous. Having a curvy booty or a "flat" one, either is beautiful! I agree. I have also found confidence in the fact that I have a man that loves me, curvy or flat. He thinks I am beautiful because of ME, and that makes my body even more beautiful to him.
So really, this post is so true and encouraging. So brave! Thank you for posting and being so honest. I hope this post encourages many women.
OH! And you rock the bikini! Great pin-ups.
Everyone is perfect to someone. As long as we're happy with ourselves and doing our best, we are all perfect. :)
...not just your body, but your words in this post are perfect.
Inspirational as always! Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us!
For me, this is one of the most honest posts I've read in a long time!
It's really impressive that you have the strength and courage to put yourself out in the internet like this. You're a hottie ;-)
I think self-loving posts like this should appear way more often and it's just so sad that you get judged so fast only because you're "admitting" you're perfect for yourself. You just made my day! Thank you so much!
thank you for writing this. I have been struggling with some body image issues for awhile and this post was so inspirational. you're beautiful!
Girl, you are absolutely gorgeous both inside and out. Love this post, love the message, love your blog! Stay awesome!
I recently came across your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I don't know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.
Alena
Low Platelets Treatment
I think you are gorgeous. And since I am also pale and have curves and curls that often refuse to behave, I want to say thank you, for making ME feel a little more beautiful too.
M.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this subject! This is a very timely topic, especially since we're in the midst of bathing suit season. I'm a feminist with a degree in Women's Studies and I *still* struggle with negative thoughts about part of my body. I don't want to waste any more of my time obsessing about that crap and I think you've provided me (and all the other women in the world) with a great way to stop doing so through your advice to love ourselves (and others) wholeheartedly and to embrace diversity.
I just want to start by saying that I normally hate when people start up with that inspirational bullshit of "You're beautiful because you're you!" simply for the reason that it normally comes from the stereotypically "perfect" person who pretends they don't have flaws by covering them. But this post is exactly what I needed. Because it came from someone who recognizes that everyone has flaws and EMBRACES THEM ANYWAY. So thank you.
I love your post and you are gorgeous. Thanks so much for this very encouraging post! It helps me a lot!
I don't have any extreme stories about my body either. I have cellulite on my thighs too and I hated wearing bikinis for awhile. But I'm over it and I feel confident regardless of my "imperfections".
And I laughed a little when you mentioned that that belly pooch and countless crunches that we do to get rid of it! I don't think it is supposed to go away.. :D
Having said that, I try my best to be active, sporty, have good posture (most of the time...) and of course, healthy. Thanks so much for this empowering post, and yes, I LOVE MY BODY. (:
I pinned this post onto my "fitness" Pinterest board so that I could come back and read it any time I need a little extra encouragement, and I've just finished re-reading it, and I'm so glad that I did.
thanks so much for this!
Totally agree with your suggestion... Very nice post and good information here... Thanks for posting that....
Great ! :)
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